He considers me as his sister

I’m in love with my brother’s best friend; I’m just crazy about him. But he considers me as his sister. What should I do? Should I tell him that I love him?
Sheena (16)

Dear Sheena,

Looks like you have very strong feelings for your brother’s best friend and are in a rush to tell your crush that you are crazy about him.

If he considers you as his sister — it is either because he doesn’t have feelings for you or because of his friendship with your brother. If it is the former, then those feelings can’t miraculously appear.

On your part, how well do you know this boy? Are you friends, too? Or is it just a ‘hi’ and ‘bye’ relationship? What makes you sure he considers you as his sister? If you don’t yet know him well enough, then being friends with him is the first step to take. As regards your brother, have you spoken to him about your feelings? What are his views? Will he be upset?

If you want to respect your brother’s friendship and yet find out whether he will change his mind, then focus on friendship. If he still sees you as a sister, then you can move on without embarrassment and spoilt relationships. If he begins to see you in a different light, and the relationship works out, more joy to you.

Nasreen Hashambhoy
Latest posts by Nasreen Hashambhoy (see all)

Nasreen Hashambhoy

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.