There is a rumour in school about me

I was good in studies but nowadays I find that I am not able to concentrate on them. There is a rumour in school that I have multiple crushes on senior girls. Though I know it is not true I just can’t go about it. How will I prove to people that I do not have crushes on my seniors?
Shivani (14)

Dear Shivani,

You must be feeling quite embarrassed that such rumours are being spread about you. There is usually no smoke without a fire. So, first it would be good to do a little self-reflection — do you idolise or hero-worship any of the seniors, or copy anyone’s style, or try to hang out with any of them, hear their talks and so on? If you do, others no doubt see it and can tease you mercilessly. Take a few moments to become aware of how you behave and feel. Hero-worship is a part of growing up and it will go away once you discover your own personality.

If you don’t show any signs of hero-worship and you know that you have no ‘crushes’ on anyone, then the rumours should neither bother you, nor is there any need to ‘prove’ anything to anyone. Find a good, supportive friend, preferably away from your school, with whom you can spend some leisure time and some study time. Take part in activities that help your own personality to shine. Go about your day with confidence, and the rumours will die down soon enough.

Nasreen Hashambhoy

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Nasreen Hashambhoy

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.