Everyone has a mental picture in their minds of who they are, what they are capable of, and where they are going in life. If you suffer from low self-confidence, it means that you have a negative view of these things in your mind. You probably feel that you are not worth much and that whatever you try will result either in mediocrity or failure. If you want to increase your self-esteem and build your self-confidence, you have to work on your self-perception.
To start the process of improving your self-esteem, you need to incorporate these daily habits into your life.
Change your self-talk
Self-talk is the act of talking to oneself, either mentally or aloud. It is any thought that pops into your head in reaction to an external stimulus. The way that you feel about situations depends on what you tell yourself.
If you think about a situation negatively, it will lead to negative emotions like irritation or anxiety. Thinking about the situation positively will lead to positive feelings like excitement or happiness. When you are working on increasing your self-esteem, you become more aware of the constant self-talk that leads to negative feelings, and you can replace it with positive self-talk that encourages higher levels of self-esteem.
For example, if you are always telling yourself that you are fat every time you look in the mirror, stop and replace these thoughts with words of encouragement. You have trained yourself to look at areas of your body that make you insecure and reinforce your insecurity by saying “I’m fat.” Teach yourself to appreciate your body or focus on an area that you feel good about. Over time, this will shift your self-image and confidence.
Affirmations are simple, positive statements that you can write about yourself to change negative thinking patterns. They help to improve self-esteem by implanting new beliefs to replace beliefs that cause low self-esteem. With enough repetition, affirmations will become implanted into your subconscious mind.
Here are a few starters. Write these out before you sleep — 21 times each for 21 days continuously. If you skip a day, start again.
- I love and accept myself unconditionally.
- I am peaceful with all my emotions. I love and approve of myself.
- I create a life filled with rewards.
Recognize that you are unique. Realize that you never get the full story and that everyone puts on a front in an attempt to disguise their insecurities. When you compare yourself to others, you are merely comparing yourself to the façade others are presenting to the world. Everyone has thoughts, doubts, insecurities, judgements and other inner battles that they deal with in their minds.
Nidhika Bahl is a Certified Coach, Teacher and Speaker with The John Maxwell Team, Master SPIRIT Life Coach, Theta Healing® Practitioner and NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) Master Practitioner and Transformation Coach. She is the author of The Queen of the Comeback (Amazon.in) and the Official Life Coach of Miss World 2017 Manushi Chillar.