Youth Counselling

His friends poisoned his mind

I was in a relationship with a boy of my age. We were always there for each other. But, his friends poisoned his mind and told him false stories about my best friend and I; that we are in a relationship behind his back. Due to this, my boyfriend broke up with me. I know he still loves me and I too love him a lot, but I don’t know what I should do now.
Akriti (14)

Dear Akriti,

Looks like you and your boyfriend shared a supportive relationship. You miss him a lot and would very much like to have him back.

However, if he has allowed his friends to ‘poison his mind’, it looks like he didn’t trust you much, unless something happened to break that trust. It is important to reflect on why your friendship with your “best friend” has caused so much trouble. Did you spend more time with your best friend than with your boyfriend? What could have happened to make his friends say that you and your best friend were ‘in a relationship behind his back’?

Looks like he is unwilling to speak to you. If he is willing to talk — as you say you are quite sure he still loves you — then ask him for a meet. Find out what has made him upset, as well as discuss your feelings and clear the misunderstandings. However, if he is unwilling to meet and listen to your point of view and your feelings, then you need to let go.

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Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.

Nasreen Hashambhoy

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.