I perform well in studies but I am a failure in sports. My parents want me to join coaching classes, but I just can’t pick up these games! I can’t bear my parents comparing me with others, particularly my friends. I have seen how girls flock around my friends when they win a match, but nobody talks to me. I feel as if I’m good for nothing.
You’re feeling quite frustrated that you have to ‘conform’ to this ‘imaginary’ standard, especially to gain the approval of your parents and peers. Looks like you’re also feeling hurt and rejected and now see yourself as a ‘failure’.
Think about it…would you really like people to flock around you because you have achieved at sports? Or would you prefer them to like you for who you truly are?
You used the word ‘perform’ for both your studies and sports. How about looking at both from a different angle and instead ‘enjoying’ whatever you do?
So, whether you take up sports, or music, or become a geek…it is your choice. When you like yourself for who you are without judging yourself and you enjoy what you do, you begin to exude more confidence and happiness…and this is what will attract others to you!
Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.