Youth Counselling

I am seriously disturbed

I am 15 and my boyfriend is 17. We are in a very healthy relationship. But sometimes I feel as if I’m hiding something from my parents. If I tell them about my boyfriend, they will never allow me to continue this relationship. I am seriously disturbed.
Urvashi

Dear Urvashi,

While you have a good relationship with your boyfriend, you’re feeling quite guilty about doing things behind your parents’ back, knowing they will not approve, and this makes you quite stressed. At this point, it is but natural that your parents will not approve of a relationship.

You will know best whether your parents are too orthodox to approve of any relationship in future, or whether they will come around to accepting it once you’re older, and if they know the person you’re in a relationship with. It will help to bring friends of both gender home — including your boyfriend — and let your parents meet them and get to know them and him personally. At the right time, you can introduce the idea of a special friend. Take time to do this and focus on keeping it light for the moment. In any case, the best relationships are first friendships, and they are neither rushed, nor are they a secret.

More articles

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.

Nasreen Hashambhoy

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.