Youth Counselling

I receive SMS messages from an unknown person

I regularly receive SMS messages from an unknown person. I think he is a good person. But even though he sounds fine, I get disturbed. I asked him not to send any more messages, but still he sends them. I don’t want to tell my parents about this because they would worry. What should I do?
Anushka (14) / Jaipur

Dear Anushka,

You seem to be torn between what you should do and what you want to do.

My two-word answer: Block him. Today’s smartphones allow us to both block and report any contact that disturbs us.

However, it is important to reflect on why you haven’t blocked him till now, though he is an ‘unknown person’ and you ‘get disturbed’. Is it because you want to continue receiving SMS messages from this ‘unknown person’? Is it because you like the attention you get? At the same time, you ‘get disturbed’ or you feel a bit guilty and afraid? What makes you tell yourself that he is ‘a very good person’, though you don’t know him at all? What kind of a person is he if he does not stop messaging even though you have asked him not to?

You do not even know who he is, nor his age, location, family, friends… For a healthy relationship, you have to interact with persons openly — not just alone, but also in family and social settings. You have taken a huge personal safety risk in interacting with a total stranger… and your parents will not just worry, but will also be angry.

Your actions are accompanied by responsibility and consequences. What you decide to do should bring you safety first. The best thing to do is to block him.

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.

Nasreen Hashambhoy

Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.