Youth Counselling

I want to be his friend as before

Five years ago, I had a crush on my best friend (now I like him only as my friend). One day without my knowledge my friend told him that I like him. From that day till today he never spoke to me. Whenever we meet now he always ignores me and avoids me and this hurts me a lot. Due to this, I have lost my appetite and can’t sleep peacefully. Whenever I see him I just feel like crying. I never wanted him to be my boyfriend. I don’t have the courage to go talk to him. I can’t take this feeling any more. All I want is to be his friend like before. What should I do?
Evangeline (17) / Pune

Dear Evangeline, one of your friends, to whom you probably told of your past crush for that boy, took the initiative to tell him that you like him. The reaction of that boy seems to be out of proportion with that information (“From that day he never spoke to me, “he always ignores me”, “avoids me”). If he is really your “best friend” you should have the courage to talk to him and ask him the reason for his behaviour. Tell him exactly what you feel and that you want to be his friend as before. Falling into depression (“I have lost my appetite”, “can’t sleep peacefully”, “I feel like crying”) does not solve your problem. You have the right to speak the truth to him and put things right. If he does not listen to you and trust you, forget about him; without trust in each other there is no real friendship.

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Dr Anthony Grugni, MD, was associated with The Teenager Today for nearly three decades in the capacity of youth counsellor.

Dr Anthony Grugni, MD

Dr Anthony Grugni, MD, was associated with The Teenager Today for nearly three decades in the capacity of youth counsellor.