I have a crush on one of my classmates. I think she too has the same feeling towards me, but we are afraid to tell each other about it. She talks to me very nicely and her love for me reflects in her talk. I want to be in a relationship with her, but I am afraid of my academic results which is already affected.
Seems like you are in a dilemma: You hold back for fear of what will happen if you tell her about your feelings, and yet you want to take some action. So, ease that pressure by actively cultivating your friendship with her as a starting point. Discover ways in which you can spend time together; for the more you get to know each other, the easier it is to “be in a relationship”. It is not as important to say, “I love you” in a hurry, as it is to lay the foundation for a strong relationship. If you focus on building the bond, it becomes easy to say the three important words with full meaning.
If your time and energy is spent thinking about one thing, then obviously other key aspects of life will get neglected, and this decision has its consequences. Your studies lay the foundation for your career, which is equally important. You need to balance both.
Nasreen Hashambhoy is a Counsellor, Life Coach and a Facilitator of training programmes for schools and corporates. Through a combination of coaching, counselling and facilitation techniques based on cognitive science and positive psychology, she helps clients achieve their true potential. She is the author of the series Values In Action published by Better Yourself Books.