Youth Counselling

She thinks of me as a friend

I am 16 years old. I love a girl who is my classmate. Six months ago I told her that I like her, even love her, but she said that she thinks of me only as a friend. After talking about it, she told me to wait till class 12. She began talking with me on Facebook. After two months she took my phone number and we started talking on the phone. She shares all her problems with me. Sometimes she texts me certain messages because of which I thought that she had also started liking me. But when I proposed to her she told me that she thinks of me as a friend. I was hurt and started thinking that she will never be in a relationship with me because I am dark-skinned. I’m confused about whether she likes me or not.

Dear Aahan, there is confusion in your mind about what love is all about. Friendship is a very beautiful form of love, open to sharing the problems of life, sincere and honest. It is commonly told: “Who finds a friend finds a treasure”. For you love is only an emotional feeling of attraction between a boy and a girl. That girl is sincere and honest with you. Time and again she told you that she thinks of you “only as a friend”. She asked you to wait a few more years in order to understand your relationship. From your side you felt hurt and thought that the problem was your dark skin. At the age of 16 you are confused about her feelings for you: be assured that she is a nice and mature person, offering you her loving friendship. Be happy with that for the time being. In a few years’ time you will understand better in which direction your relationship should go.