Bob's Banter

The cavity and the tongue!

Cartoon of man exaggerating while telling his friend about a fish he caught

A patient once told his dentist, “I can feel a huge cavity with my tongue.”

The dentist examined the man’s teeth and said, “It’ll only be a small filling.”

“But why does it feel so large?” asked the puzzled patient.

“Just the natural tendency of the tongue to exaggerate!” replied the dentist with a twinkle in his eye.

Some years ago, a man by the name of Ronald worked for me. Ronald was a talker if ever there was one. If Ronald was sent to the bank, he would come back with a tale of how he was waylaid by robbers and had to fight them off as he brought back the withdrawn cash. We laughed at his exaggerated accounts, found them amusing and thought them harmless till I started finding small amounts missing from petty cash. The amounts became larger, till it was discovered that Ronald was a big thief.

I had to sack the fellow. His little exaggerated stories should have warned me he was dishonest, but I didn’t heed the warning till it was too late!

A young girl said to her father, “I have a habit that I know is hurting my life, dad; the habit of exaggeration. I start to tell something and I go on and on enlarging the story. My friends suspect it’s not true, and they lose confidence in me. I’m trying to get over it. Could you help me, dad?”

Said her wise father, “Call it lying and you may get over it!”

We often excuse our pet habits by giving them acceptable names.

Our bad temper, we call ‘nerves’!

Our untruthfulness, ‘exaggeration’!

Our dishonesty, ‘good business’!

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Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist with an estimated readership of 6 million. He also conducts a short-term writer’s course. Contact him at bobsbanter@gmail.com for more details.

Robert Clements

Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist with an estimated readership of 6 million. He also conducts a short-term writer’s course. Contact him at bobsbanter@gmail.com for more details.