The walk of realization
It had obviously rained last night. I barely slept, as thunder roared in the distance, my thoughts, similarly, thundered through my mind. As the rain fell on the parched earth, my tears rolled down my cheeks. As water flooded the darkened streets, my mind was inundated with memories. It was morning now and it had stopped raining. The air outside was cool and was beckoning me outside. All I wanted was to feel the cool rush of air against my face; and the calm that it would bring. Without waiting for a second, possibly contradictory thought, I hastened to meet the morning with a walk towards nowhere, at my own pace, on my own terms.
Thankfully, there were barely any people outside. If there had been people I know, I would’ve had to answer several questioning glances, since I am not an early bird. But today, I wanted to be alone. I had closed my mind to any and every external distraction. For some reason though, that didn’t seem enough. I wanted to be physically alone as well. Away from the nosy and perpetually inquisitive eyes of people and the noise of the ever active world. Hence, I was a little pleased that people were yet to step out.
Every single step that I took brought forth a memory to life. Memories that were happy, sad, and most importantly, shared. This reminds me that I have not mentioned the reason for the tears in my eyes. The reason for which I was sad. What were those memories? Well, let’s just say that it really hurts when people you know become people that you once knew. True isn’t it? That explains why I was sad. And it hurts even more because that person mattered so much to me. And that got me thinking:
Why on earth do relationships have to be like this, momentary, and so fragile?
There for some time and then gone! Can they not last forever?
That is when I began to wonder about love. Was it just another feeling that comes and goes, changing and twisting with each passing day? Was it something that was to be professed on Valentine’s Day and then conveniently forgotten and discarded later? Was it something material, could it be just bought? Was it something shown in the gifts and flowers given? And most of all was love only the love between a girl and a guy? No, no and for a third time NO! I was on the wrong track and I knew I was mistaken in my belief.
But then a better picture came to me. It showed me what love really can be, and is. Love is pure and divine. Love is beyond any definition. Love is lots of caring, understanding and a huge amount of trust. Love is about sacrifices. May sound philosophical, no, I know, but that is the truth as I can see now.
I looked around me, and here was my biggest example, nature. Hadn’t the Great Power Divine created all this out of love? The world was created out of love and was supposed to work on the basis of love as well. But look at what we’ve made of it! We’ve made love just a passing feeling, a product. Committed today and separated the day after! Is that how it is supposed to be, is that right? Definitely no!
But wait, all love in the world is not lost. Luckily some of it still remains for us. But dark shadows in our minds keep it hidden and we fail to see it. Just change your perspective a little and you will. And I did change my perspective of looking at things and it brought me joy. I remembered my mother. Yes, the person who loves me more than anyone would, without a condition. She cared for me before she could even see me. She sacrificed her wants for me, bore pain for my sake. And my dad, he too has sacrificed a lot of things for me. Isn’t that love? It is! More precious than anything else in the world, and so unconditional. There are people who love me. How can I forget my close friends who are there with me through thick and thin? I was wrong. Relationships do last long and those are the relationships based on true love, true love that is not based on terms and conditions. Love that doesn’t ‘occur’ today and end tomorrow.
As this realization grew on me, I wiped my tears. Folded my hands and closed my eyes and thanked God for giving me a new day, a new opportunity and most of all for these thoughts and a realization. As the sun rose higher, I put on a broad smile on my face. I promised myself that I’ll never be sad about such things again and that I’ll spread my cheer around me. I turned back, onwards to home. It was just a walk, but for me it changed how I look at life. With every step I took, I promised myself that I’d be a better person and would share the love I felt, the real thing! The journey had just begun!